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Thursday, February 6, 2014

Don't Flush Your Toilet Paper

I thought the major news story about the fact that you can't flush your toilet paper in Sochi during the Olympics to be hilarious.  We couldn't flush our toilet paper the entire time we were in Ecuador.  All of our bathroom garbage cans had lids for "discretion," and it was always funny to watch our visitors' faces when we told them about the "rule."  I guess that's one of the things we take for granted when we live in a "First World Country" and one of the many things we have to learn to deal with when we live and travel abroad.  Yes, it's disgusting and unhygienic; it's just one of those "things" one has to get used to in this life.

I remember kind of rolling my eyes when our sponsors told us about the rule.  We didn't listen, of course.  We figured we lived in a house with marble floors and a pool; what could be more telling than that?  After about three months, the plumbing started to clog; and the smell from the sewer grate right outside our house got rancid.  We took the hint.  Another "hint" that our sponsors gave us--and we promptly blew off--was to always have toilet paper on us.  See, I don't remember seeing a public toilet in all of Ecuador that either had an actual toilet seat or that contained toilet paper.  Sure, oftentimes, there were pay dispensers on the wall.  And you did get a good bit for the nickel you had to pay to buy it.  But how many times out of ten do you actually have a nickel--not five pennies or a dime or a quarter, but a nickel--when you really need one?  Let's just say that I was lucky our oldest son was still in diapers.  We never carried T.P., but we ALWAYS had baby wipes!  Let me also say that trying to "squat" over a seat-less toilet while massively pregnant with my second son was a very...difficult and unpleasant experience.  Okay, so enough toilet humor; but I will say that when moving to a foreign country, always carry T.P.

I've probably written before about the "line" issue in foreign countries.  FYI, Americans: most foreign countries done "do" lines.  Actually, most of them don't do what we like to call "personal space" either.  As someone who was raised in the South, this was absolutely a difficult thing for me to get used to.  Southerners by tradition are very manner-conscious, and we don't like to jump in front of people (or knock them completely out of the way like I've seen other places), and we try to always make sure that the people who were there first actually get to go first.  Not so in Ecuador or in Albania.  I used to take it personally, thinking that if I just knew how to say "such and such" in whatever the local language was, that I'd be able to voice my displeasure.  I thought I was getting pushed around and that people were jumping ahead of me because I was a foreigner.  Well, that's just not so.  They jump in front of everyone, even little old ladies who've been waiting forever.

Albania is funny for that.  I think everyone who reads my blog knows that I love it here; so I will speak freely and hope that everyone realizes that I do not mean to offend the Albanian people in any way.  In Albania, both older people and children are shown great respect.  It's not uncommon at all for people to greet each other as "Zoti" or "Zonya," the English equivalent of "sir" or "ma'am."  They might tip their hat to an older person and then just jump in front of them when paying in the line.  There's no malice intended; it's just how it's done.  Someone explained to me that traffic and lines/crowds in Albania are like running water.  If there is a space to fill up--no matter how small--people are going to fill it up.  This includes, but is not limited to, jumping in line when you've got one foot of space between yourself and the person in front of you and cutting through two lanes of traffic so they can get in front of you, even if there's a parked bus on the shoulder of the road they have to pull behind.  Traffic circles work much the same way.  People don't really yield or move with the turn; rather, they just drive straight across it until their turn comes.  Once you realize that's how it's "done" here, driving becomes a lot less scary and intimidating.  I guess you have to see it to believe it.

Another thing I had to get used to is that there's no just walking up to the salesperson in a store or shop and asking a question.  There's always a greeting that must take place, or the person asking the question is seen as rude.  I still forget this one and get embarrassed when I do.   I have not been able to pick up the "mire" cultural dance that I see everyone having.  "Mire" (rhymes with deer) in Albanian means "good" or "well."  Whenever people meet up in the street or in a store, they do what I call the "mire dance."  It basically boils down to a conversation like this:
Person #1: Hi! How are you?
Person #2: Good. You?
Person #1: Good.  How is everything? Good?
Person #2: Good, good.  And how is everything with you? Good?
Person#1: Good.  How is your family? Good?
Person #2: Good, good.  And your family is good?
Person #1: Good.  They are good.
Person #2: Good. Have a good day!
Person #1: Have a good day!

And so it goes, on and on and on.  But, to an American, all we ever here is "mire, mire mire."

I love the little cultural quirks that different places have; of course, sometimes I hate them too.  I've said it before, and I'll say it again:  Each posting is what you make of it.  If you're ready to get mad at everything like I was on my first posting, you're going to find yourself unhappy.  If you're willing to brush things off, you'll be okay.  Just know that almost EVERYTHING is different, not just the language and the food or the way people dress.  Nothing is going to be the same, but that doesn't mean that we can't enjoy it.  And what we need to remember is that we are but guests in their country.  It's our job to change to fit in with their culture, not their job to change to fit in with ours.  And remember to carry toilet paper.






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